#BEGONE FIENDS! SHOO!

[banyanas]

sudden horrible self doubt re: pilot au series

[mrsoharaa]

"I will fuck you shamelessly and maliciously in front of these pesky peasants, do not toy with me woman" - Ryomen Sukuna 😵‍💫💓💦

[mnstcrbnll]

[copperbadge]

Angels Don’t Say Butthole

Trillian gave to the fountain fundraiser and requested:  Cats with Leverage or Good Omens please!

Title: Angels Don’t Say Butthole

Rating: I’m going with General despite repeated use of the word “butthole”. 

Notes: True facts: the last film I saw in cinemas before the pandemic, and thus the last film I saw in cinemas at all, was Cats. With my parents. Who cried openly and sincerely at the ending. It was wild. 

Also it just occurred to me you might mean like. Actual cats, not the movie. So...maybe sorry about this, and if you don’t like it HMU for something more along the lines of Eliot cuddling a stray tomcat. 

As with many demonic acts, this one contained within it the seeds of its own annoyance. 

Crowley could not take credit for Andrew Lloyd Weber -- or rather, he did take credit, but it hadn’t actually been his doing. Still, when he had discovered that the musical Cats, which in the eighties he’d felt was in fact rather clever, had been made into a movie, Cats, which in the 2010s was in fact deeply terrible, he’d immediately brought it to Aziraphale, who was horrified and delighted in equal measure.

The angel had never needed Crowley’s help driving customers from his bookshop, but Crowley liked to think he contributed in his own way. As it turned out, on the rare days the shop was open, often it was the most trouble to shoo the last remaining stragglers out in the evening. Eventually, Aziraphale hit upon a solution: he hung a projection screen on the end of a shelf he particularly wanted nobody to ever go look at, and at closing time he turned on a little digital projector Crowley had set up for him and played Cats. 

No mortal even made it to Idris Elba’s first shot in the opening sequence. 

At least, not for the first two weeks. And then it backfired spectacularly. 

“Why are there so many humans here?” Aziraphale hissed at Crowley. There were at least a dozen, maybe more; they had come armed with bags of popcorn (Not around the books!) and various bottled drinks (Merciful heaven, the books) and, unbelievably, most had some form of collapsible chair that they were setting up in the central rotunda of the shop. 

Facing the projection screen. 

“I think they’re here for the movie,” Crowley said.

“Yeah!” one of the humans added. “There’s a rumor the guy who owns the place has the butthole cut.”

“The what,” Aziraphale repeated. Crowley, who spent more time on Reddit, went poker-faced and performed a quick miracle.

“I know what’s happening,” he said. “Bad news is, there are a whole lot of mortals here to see Cats.”

“What could the good news possibly be?” Aziraphale asked.

“Nobody here is going to buy a single book from you.” 

Aziraphale did seem to calm at that, at least until he flipped the switch on the projector. About a minute in, someone gasped.

“It IS the butthole cut!” he announced, and everyone cheered.

“I could not despise you more,” Aziraphale said to Crowley, who kissed his cheek. “Begone, fiend.” 

“Off I go to the heaviside layer,” Crowley agreed, but then all he did was miracle himself up a sofa in the front row and take up the entire thing, making sure that someone’s cellphone rang at least every ten minutes for the entire film.

[nyctolovian]

Summary: Martin is an incubus and Jon is the drunken human who just accidentally summoned him.

Written for @aspecarchivesweek Day 4 prompt: AU

Warning: nudity, terrible humor and shenanigans

Martin felt a prickle at the back of his neck and hummed. A call. How unusual.

He lifted his head and looked skyward, or as skyward one was allowed to look up from the depths of the underworld. It was unusual, being called in this day and age. Humans, as a society, had long moved on from their initial obsession with witchcraft and demonic rituals so summoning for underworld beings had been and far between.

Usually, the minor demons would be clamouring over one another, in a flurry for a chance to feed upon human soul. However, as the ceiling of the underworld was burned open with a summoning circle and light from the human realm streamed in, the imps and lesser fiends around him cowered. In fact, they actively avoided eye contact with Martin. Intrigued, Martin licked the air and let the scent of blood settle on his senses. When he recognised the taste it left on his tongue, he blinked in surprise.

The call… was for Martin. Specifically.

From the corner of his eye, some of the other demons shifted out of his way politely. Slowly, Martin rose from his spot, stretching his arms and grunting softly as his joints popped at the movement. 

“Long time, eh?”

“Sure is. I just hope it’s not another horny teenager,” Martin muttered and glanced at Tim who grinned slyly at him. He was violating several social rules, which usually signalled an invitation to confrontation, but Martin knew Tim well enough to recognise the lack of hostility. Besides, it was absurd to compete for this particular summoning. Every demon was curiously watching with bated breath. Interrupting this would ruin the fun. After all, the art of summoning specific demons was thought to have long been lost. 

Especially something as specific as summoning a demon by name. 

Martin couldn’t help the shiver of anticipation as he spread his wings. What could be waiting for him beyond the circle? With a deep breath, he launched himself upwards. As he approached the summoning circle, he felt the familiar light tingle of cool air against his skin. As his hands curled around the edges of the circle, it burned into his fingers. 

Martin heaved himself up into the human realm and found the summoner, staring up at him with wide dark eyes. This was not an unusual reaction. Martin could be a terrifying sight indeed to a human, with his large ram horns and razor-sharp teeth. But humans were terribly confused creatures who often mistook their rapidly racing hearts for carnal thrill so it had always worked in Martin's favour. 

Smoke poured out of the summoning circle and he stepped out into the dark bedroom. “Why, good evening,” he greeted with a smile.

The human was quite the frazzled mess with his unshaved face, and black but greying locks tied up in a high fuzzy bun. He was wearing a purple cotton skirt that fell to his ankles, and the baggiest possible shirt with the words "Trust me, I Majored in Not Giving a Fuck" printed on the front. Clutched in his hands was a thick tattered volume of which he made full use by shielding his eyes with it.

He smelled of alcohol and a dark red coloured his brown cheeks deliciously. Martin's suspicions were confirmed when he stepped another stepped forward and kicked an empty can of beer, sending it rolling across the room and hitting a stack of newspapers on the floor with a dull klunk.

Questionable choices aside, he looked rather adorable and Martin might say this looked to be one of his finer catches. If only said summoner didn’t immediately scrunch his handsome face in disgust and mortification. 

“Oh, fuck!” the summoner said. “Wha— I thought…?” He narrowed his eyes at the pages of the book in his hands and let out the most exasperated groan Martin had ever heard. Then, he hurled the book at the wall. "Agh god! This is what I bloody get for sleep deprivation, I suppose. A fucking incubus!"

If Tim were in Martin's situation, he might have slid in a quip like, "Oh, if it pleases you, and I know it will, I can be a fucking incubus." Or a line that sounds much smoother than anything Martin could come up with. But Martin was not Tim so he just flinched awkwardly as the summoner's glare shot upwards and practically bore holes into him. 

“Alright, back into the circle,” the human said. “Back! Back!” He walked towards Martin and waved his arms dismissively, wobbling every step in his intoxicated state.

“Are y– Are you seriously shooing me?” he huffed at the audacity. “Like some cat?”

“Do I need to invite you out? Or perhaps I should rescind my invitation as if you’re a vampire. Begone, demon!” he said, flailing his arms ridiculously.

Martin looked incredulously at the small man. “But you summoned me! You can’t just shoo me away!”

“Look, I’m sorry. There’s been a mistake.”

“A mistake?!” Martin shouted. How could he be summoned by name (by name!!) in a mistake! It was unheard of and he was frankly quite offended. He gesticulated wildly, searching for the words to express how utter bullshit this was. But rage rendered him speechless and he could only sputter broken noises. 

“I read the wrong page and did the wrong ritual. I never meant to get… this.” He motioned to all of Martin, as though somehow greatly offended by the demon’s emergence he brought about himself. “What do I have to do to send you back?”

“I have to finish my contract, human! I can’t be sent back any old how.”

He frowned, hilariously befuddled. “Which is?”

“Take a guess,” the incubus deadpanned.

“Ah. That’d be… hm… difficult,” he said. “Ah! I think Sasha next door has been rather pent up lately. If you went out and knocked on the first door to your right, a nice young lady—that’s Sasha—will open the door and you could render your lovely services to her.”

“What? No, you can’t–”

The summoner clearly did not hear him because he nodded to himself sagely, humming in self-approval. He made his way over to the living room, swaying from side to side. "Oh. Wait." He halted just outside the main door. “No, that doesn’t sound like a good idea after all.”

Martin pinched the bridge of his nose. “Of course it isn't–”

“It’s better if I came with you to explain things. I don’t think she’d be keen on receiving a random stranger, and especially not someone who’s in this state of…” The summoner pulled a face of disgust. “Of undress.”

“Wh– I’m an incubus for hell’s sake! What other state of dress could I possibly be in? I'm not usually summoned to be taken on a stroll outside!”

"It's just a short walk. I wouldn't constitute that as a stroll," he mumbled. “I’m sure Sasha can appreciate this look better than I ever could. That’s a thing most other people appreciate, right? Must be,” he decided, opening the door.

Immediately, Martin slammed it shut. “Wait! No! That’s not the point! You can’t just cart me off to another human!”

Folding his arms like a petulant child in a supermarket, the human demanded, “Why the hell not?!”

“Because you made the contract! It’s your blood on the sacrificial circle, not this… this Sasha person.”

“Well,” he said, pout upon his lips, “that’s inconvenient.” He sat on the floor and tucked the skirt of his dress inwards.

Then, came the first breathing moment Martin had had since he first emerged from the summoning circle. 

Head lolling against the wooden door, the summoner slumped into himself and exhaled loudly. “What now?” 

“Well, um,” Martin said, “I usually begin things by finding out what my summoner’s name is.”

The human blinked sleepily, as though not registering for a moment (and perhaps he really didn’t), before saying, “You’re not going to… steal my name or something, right?”

“What? No!” Martin exclaimed.

“Sorry. I was just–”

“You summoned me yourself! You should know damn well I’m not a fae!”

“God, I’m sorry! It’s not every day I summon something."

Martin sighed heavily. "Yeah, it's fine. I'm sorry too. For yelling."

They settled back down into quietness. “It’s Jon. My, uh, my name. And you’re… A long name I can’t remember.” He grunted as he pushed himself up to get the book.

“Actually, just call me Martin. Don’t… Don’t use my full demonic name.”

Jon slid back down lazily. “Alright then, Martin. Is there any way we can, um, complete the contract without doing any of the–” He gestured vaguely– “stuff.”

"There's nothing else, really," Martin said with a wince of sympathy. "I am a sex demon after all so I trade in sex favours."

Deflating like a balloon, Jon let out a puff of frustration. "Oh, bollocks," he muttered. "Just my luck to summon a sex demon. Of all the wrong demons."

"Oh, so it's the sex demon part and not specifically the incubus part?"

"Yes. Don't, um, don't get me wrong I'm not a prude or anything. I'm just, well, terribly asexual," Jon said, fidgeting with the hem of his collar. "Do you… Is that something you're familiar with?"

"Oh, yeah. Humans like that have existed for ages," Martin replied and Jon visibly relaxed. "I've never been summoned by one before though."

Pulling the collar over his mouth, Jon chuckled drunkenly, his nose crinkling delightfully as he did so. "That's fair."

Martin couldn’t help the little upward curl of his own lips. Jon had a nice laugh, one that soothed and gently brushed away the tension in your chest. Martin found his chest warming at it and he sort of wished he could hear the pleasant sound again. 

The laugh faded with a soft exhale. "Is there really no other way I can… end the contract?" 

Martin gave Jon a pitying look. "Look, I'm… How about kissing? Kissing can be sexual and—"

"Kissing's worse."

Martin blinked. "Really?"

"I'm kiss-averse. Lips on lips is just… All that wet breathy movement. It just…" Jon pulled a face of revolt and exaggerated shudder to demonstrate his point. "You know? I mean, of course you don't. It's just stupid."

"No no no. It's not stupid at all," Martin assured him as he sat down on the floor so Jon didn't have to crane his neck to look at him. "Reasonable, in fact."

"Thank you!" Jon said. "Kissing has zero appeal. What is there to like about it other than the fact that it's supposed to be a show of affection? At least with sex it's not so bad. To me, at least."

"Not so bad how? Um, if, well, if I may ask…"

"I… It's…" Jon was sliding further and further onto the floor until his entire back was against the floor and his head was propped up by the door behind him. He exhaled through the corners of his mouth. "I'm… sort of neutral, I suppose? It's complicated. And quite a lot. I-I… I wouldn't want to go on for too long. I mean, I'd just bore you and—"

"I'd say I'm a pretty good listener. You'd be surprised how much pillow talk I do with the humans who summon me." Martin laughed sheepishly as he scratched the back of his head.

It was clear the moment Jon's restraint snapped because something in his eyes changed. Immediately, Jon was launched into an alcohol-driven spiel. "It's a fluctuating thing, you see? Most of the time, I forget sex is even a thing so when I'm suddenly reminded of its existence, I'm incredibly caught of guard. It's dumb but I feel offended even. That's why this—" he gestured to all of Martin— "is frankly rather off-putting. No offense."

Martin shifted awkwardly.

"But sometimes, you know, it feels… okay? As in I-I want it sometimes. Not often. Maybe once every three months, it sounds like a fascinating idea. But then there's no one in mind to do it with and I don't feel comfortable just… picking someone. And—" He frowned, his brow wrinkling cutely. "God, this is embarrassing to talk about. I didn't even talk about this in as much detail with Georgie. She's my, uh, my ex. It just never seemed like the right time to talk about it and then suddenly we've drifted apart and…” Jon sighed loudly. “I just never could talk to her about things. Even if they bothered me." A look of devastation crossed his features as his arms slackened. "God, this is probably why we broke up," he breathed.

"I'm sorry," Martin said consolingly. 

Sliding further onto the floor till he was completely lying on it, Jon held a hand up. "No. No, it's been a long time since then. I'm no longer hung up about it. I just… well, this thing… my relationship with sex as a… thing. It just creeps up on me once in a while. It complicates things. So you can see why this is an odd situation I've accidentally gotten us into?" He turned his body so he lay on his side. 

"Yeah."

His eyes were pleading as he pulled his legs up to lie in a foetal position. "I'm really sorry I got us into this mess.”

“Don’t worry,” Martin said. “We’ll figure a way out of this together.”

Hesitantly, Jon nodded. 

Martin wracked his brain for any possible solution. He sat there for a good minute before his brain gave out. “No good, I can’t think of any right now.”

Silence.

"Jon?"

The slowness and depth of his breathing made Martin frown in suspicion. He approached Jon tentatively and peered at his face. Sure enough, lying there with his eyes lightly lidded and arms crossed over his chest, the human was sleeping. 

“What?!” Martin exclaimed, nudging him with his foot. “Did you seriously pass out in 5 seconds?!”

Thankfully, Jon was not entirely in dreamland yet because he furrowed his brow, refusing to open his eyes, and grumbled, “Wha…?”

In utter dismay, Martin yelled, “Jon, you can’t sleep on the floor like this!”

“You’re not the boss of me,” he slurred out in drunken drowsiness, turning his face towards the floor.

A groan of exasperation left Martin. “You’ll catch a bloody cold!” he scolded. “Your head will be aching and you’ll have a crick in your neck at the very least.” He squatted down and began shaking the human violently. 

This time, Jon’s eyes flew open in shock and he immediately squeezed it shut. “Ack! For fuck’s sake! Why is the first thing I see when I open my eyes your big smelly dick?!” 

"Wh- It's not smelly!"

Jon rolled out of Martin’s grasp. “I’m up. I’m up.” Sitting up, he began to rub his eyes.

Martin rolled his eyes. “We wouldn’t have to come to this if you didn’t decide to fall asleep on the floor like a caveman. I thought you humans will have a better appreciation of the comforts of a bed.”

“I’m tired, alright? God, you'll be stuck here for a while, won't you?” Jon said.

Martin hummed.

“Let's get you something to wear. I can’t have you going around butt naked in my house.” He stood up and gestured for Martin to come with him. And because he was wobbling dangerously as he walked, Martin followed him to make sure he didn’t trip and die on the way to his bedroom. 

After flinging his wardrobe doors open dramatically, Jon scanned its contents with folded contemplative arms. He grabbed a pair of boxers and tossed them into Martin’s arms. “Try it on. These are the biggest I’ve got so if you can’t fit into these, I’ll murder you.”

Brushing the strange threat off as a drunkard’s words, Martin stepped into the boxers. They were a tad bit of a squeeze but he supposed they could be considered a fit. When he looked up, Jon threw a dress over him with the hanger still on, checking the fit with narrowed eyes, before sighing and shoving it back into his wardrobe. 

They went through several iterations of this before Jon ran out of clothes. Not that this was unexpected, if you asked Martin. Jon was quite scrawny, standing at about 160cm and completely dwarfed by Martin’s broad-shouldered figure of 192cm. It was already a miracle that Jon had any underwear at all that fit him and Martin expressed as much to Jon.

“Aren’t I dressed enough?” he added. 

However, that only earned himself a scathing glare from Jon. “If you think being in a pair of boxers is called ‘dressed enough’ then you’re terribly wrong,” he replied. 

Martin decided not to comment that this was the most dressed he has ever been, even more than that time he wore lacy lingerie during a summon. 

“Aha!” Jon cried, slapping Martin’s shoulder. “I have just the thing!” He squeezed between Martin and his bed and fetched a plastic chair from the corner of his room. 

Clumsily, he clambered onto the chair and if Martin had a heart, it would leap to his throat at the way Jon rocked. Then, he stood on the chair to reach the top shelf of the wardrobe and Martin's hands shot out to steady the incredibly drunk and wobbly human. 

And good thing that Martin did because Jon suddenly lurched leftwards. Martin let out a frightful squeak as he caught Jon. "Careful!"

In his arms, Jon was stiff with shock. He pursed his lips nervously. 

He really did have a nice face, round and sharp in all the right places. Short but thick lashes that flickered as he blinked. Uneven lips with the left corner curling upwards slightly, as though just to keep things interesting. Thick, strong eyebrows that accentuated his eyes—dark eyes that were so soulfully deep, one could drown in it, and Martin was struggling to breathe a bit actually.

"I… Uh, thanks?" Jon mumbled as his gaze fell. Upon seeing what he had pulled out on the way down however, his face lit up. "There!" he exclaimed, lifting the thing in his hand triumphantly. "A bathrobe!"

Martin sighed in frustration, slowly let the scrawny man down and accepted the proffered bathrobe. Jon was about to step onto the chair again but Martin pulled him off and set him onto the bed behind them, where he could not endanger his own life. “Alright, alright. No more climbing up things tonight. What do you need?” Martin said. 

Huffing, Jon flopped backwards onto the bed. “I need to close it.” 

“I’ll do it,” he said. He raised his hands and easily shut the upper shelf of the wardrobe. With that settled, he put the bathrobe on, tying it neatly, and turned to Jon. “Alright, what–” He stopped when he saw Jon fast asleep in the most bizarre position, upper body on the bed while his entire lower body dangled off, his skirt fanned out as the human slept with his legs stretched onto the floor. 

Martin grimaced openly. This was going to be one long summoning. This Jon person was really quite the hassle. Sure, Martin has met his fair share of human disasters—adulterers, gamblers, sex deviants. But he has never met this particular brand of mess before. 

Still, he couldn’t bear to leave Jon in this state. Let it be said that Martin the Incubus was an excellent bed partner. He leaned down and picked Jon up to lay him properly on his bed. While Martin tried to tuck Jon into bed, sleepy arms wound around his neck. It was quite cute actually, so Martin let him. 

When he was done, Martin tried to push Jon off, but the stubborn human only clung tighter. He tried to pry Jon’s arms apart. To his horror, that made Jon let out a whine before he threw his leg over Martin’s back and tugged with more force than Martin thought he was capable of in his sleep.

“Oomph!” Martin steadied himself before he fell and crushed the poor human under his weight. “You really are a bloody handful!” 

They wrestled for a while longer before Martin let out a groan of sufferance, jostled himself a space on the bed and lay down, all while making sure he didn’t accidentally hurt Jon with his ram horns. As though satisfied, Jon’s stick-thin limbs wound round Martin’s body and he pressed his face against his chest. Jon was all elbows and knees, and all that shifting in his slumber did not help. But, left with not much of a choice, Martin resigned himself to Teddy Bear Duty. 

[kinglazrus]

Awe, come on! I just wanted to show you the awesomeness of sunflower seed- 🚪 You! Get out of this inbox vile temptress! -🗝️ Ugh. Key. I should've known you'd show up. Shoo! I've awesome sunflower seed facts to distract Laz with!-🚪 No! Begone foul fiend! I banish thee from this askbox! -🗝️ What?! This power! I'm being pulled away! How? Noooooo! -🚪 Ha! I'm victorious.... A pity I had to use up my power to banish her.... I'm sorry.... *Cough* it looks like this is it your magesty...-🗝️

Keyholder, no! We need a doctor! Medic! Cleric! Anyone!

[badlydrawnstuff]

this is old feat loki having been dead p1

.

Actual Toaster: Robin: *he kicks the door open. Jesus* Hail, Izanagi! How are you this fine day? MeowMix: Izanagi: *he looks up from his book*Hello, Robin-san. I'm doing just fine. Yourself? Actual Toaster: Robin: I'm doing quite alright, thanks for asking! Just left something behind. MeowMix: Izanagi: You'd better find it, before someone else does. Actual Toaster: Robin: Oh I will. Was there someone in particular you were thinking would take it? MeowMix: Izanagi: Cats. Any of the thieves. Someone who sees it, picks it up, and decides its theirs. Actual Toaster: Robin: If you mean the Phantom Thieves, you forget I'm part of them! MeowMix: Izanagi: Would they be the only thieves around? Actual Toaster: Robin: Well, I suppose that's a fair point... Actual Toaster: Robin: ...Although I can't see why anyone would take a bow... MeowMix: Izanagi: Speaking of taking, have you heard from Loki as of late? He's taking a while to return. Actual Toaster: Robin: *he gives Izanagi a strange look* Has Lupin not told you already? MeowMix: Izanagi: I.. Haven't seen him around, either.. Actual Toaster: Robin: Akechi is dead. Headshot. Loki was his active Persona. MeowMix: Izanagi: ... ... What? Actual Toaster: Robin: Goro Akechi is dead. He died in the Palace a few days ago- he was shot. MeowMix: Izanagi: And Loki..? Actual Toaster: Robin: Loki was his active Persona at the time. There's a very high likelyhood he's dead, too, since his life was directly tied to Akechi's. MeowMix: Izanagi: .... ..... And where, exactly, is his body? Actual Toaster: Robin: His body is probably gone by now... Akechi was reported missing and his apartment was searched for clues. Actual Toaster: Robin: So if Loki's body was there, it's probably been taken by the police to the morgue as a John Doe. MeowMix: Izanagi: Great. Excellent. I can't wait to break into a morgue to shove revival beads down a corpse's throat. So exciting. *the sass. it is real* Actual Toaster: Robin: ...I... can take you to the apartment if you want to look around for yourself.. I doubt they would have found his room. MeowMix: *In the distance, Thanatos screaming. skreee. What is he screaming at this time? This cat, apparently.* Actual Toaster: *gabriel can be heard cursing out this same cat. This is. truly beautiful.* MeowMix: Thanatos: *he's lost the ability to words. Only screaming now.* Actual Toaster: Gabriel: *I mean, she's not really coherent either, it's mostly cursing here, in various languages. Its actually impressive considering she basically never swears otherwise. all because of cat. But suddenly, a sentence!* Get back here, you little...! MeowMix: *and Sissel, trying to evade both of these hellions, skids and dashes into the next room, and right up the first person he sees. I hope you don't mind claws, Robin* Actual Toaster: Robin: Ow, ow, ow! MeowMix: Sissel: *Robin's head is his perch, now, and he's got something in his mouth* Actual Toaster: Robin: *he reaches up and grabs Sissel, and pulls him off his head* That hurt, you know, you fiend! MeowMix: Sissel: mrow! Actual Toaster: Gabriel: *and she she busts in, with a look like a wild animal on her face* H-hand over that cat at once! Actual Toaster: Robin: *what the hell is goING ON* What do you want with a cat..?? MeowMix: *Thanny nearly crashes into Gabby, but manages to stop himself* MeowMix: Thanatos: Not the cat..! What it has in it's mouth..! Actual Toaster: Robin: ??? What are you after that for?? Leave the poor thing alone. Actual Toaster: Gabriel: It's a matter of my job! Give me the cat, please, so I can take what's rightfully mine! MeowMix: Thanatos: It isn't yours! Actual Toaster: Gabriel: It is, too! Actual Toaster: Robin: ... *he looks to Izanagi* You like cats, right? MeowMix: Izanagi: Hand him over. Actual Toaster: Robin: *so he does* MeowMix: Izanagi: Hello, Sissel. *he looks at Gabby and Thanny* Neither of you are getting him. Shoo. Begone with you. Actual Toaster: Gabriel: But- Actual Toaster: Robin: You heard him, shoo, shoo. *he waves his hands at gabby and thanny, like hes chasing away a child* MeowMix: Thanatos: *he makes a groaning noise, and turns to leave* Actual Toaster: Gabriel: *she also leaves, though she seems. Irritated.* MeowMix: Izanagi: *he looks down at Sissel. What IS that in his mouth..?* MeowMix: *Sissel mews, and time stops. Someone else appears to be in the World of the Dead!* Actual Toaster: soul: {.......} MeowMix: Sissel: *he assumes Yomiel's form, as per default* Eh? Still not talking? Actual Toaster: soul: {...... I didn't think there was much to comment on...} MeowMix: Sissel: {You can speak, alright! That's great. Do you know who you are? Or why you are here?} Actual Toaster: soul: {Who I am...? I'm...} *they pause for a minute, thinking it over* {Loki. But I don't think I can answer your other question right now, things are still a bit foggy.} *Loki takes his proper form!* MeowMix: Sissel: {Hello, Loki. There's no other way to tell you- You've died.} Actual Toaster: Loki: {Oh- that would make sense. But this isn't Niflheim- where is this?} MeowMix: Sissel: {The World of the Dead. Psychopomps were trying to steal you away.. I don't know what they'd do with you.} Actual Toaster: Loki: {I wouldn't really know, either, especially if neither of them comes from my home.} MeowMix: Sissel: {I doubt they do.} Actual Toaster: Loki: {But, well, er- now what? I suppose, as I am dead, I can't really stick around...} MeowMix: Sissel: {You won't be for much longer, if you know where your body is.} Actual Toaster: Loki: {It's in the apartment I shared with Robin and Goro... But I'm not sure you can ask Robin, and you definitely can't ask Goro...} MeowMix: Sissel: {Well, I'm going to anyway.} Actual Toaster: Loki: {I'm not sure Robin is alive either, and Goro is dead.} MeowMix: Sissel: *he exits the WotD, and looks at Robin, before letting Loki's soul go. it can float there* {You mean this Robin?} Actual Toaster: Loki: {Yes, that's him. I would have thought he would have died, too.} MeowMix: Sissel: {Well, here goes nothing. And something.} Loki says that he thought you'd have died, too. Care to explain? Actual Toaster: Robin: *AAA WHAT THE FUCK THE CAT IS TALKING* MeowMix: Izanagi: Oh, is this Loki? *he puts a hand under the soul, which is Loki* Actual Toaster: Loki: {Rrright, I forgot to mention Robin has absolutely no ability to react calmly to anything supernatural...} MeowMix: Sissel: {Eh? Not at all? That'll be interesting.} Actual Toaster: Robin: And how is that Loki?! (It looks nothing like him...!) MeowMix: Sissel: It's his soul. He's definitely dead- No doubt about it. *he drops his voice an octave, to match his voice in the WotD* We've got a mystery to solve, fellas. Where's this stiff's body at? Actual Toaster: Robin: Well, I knew that much already... MeowMix: Sissel: Y'wanna answer me, pal? Actual Toaster: Robin: Well, like I said earlier, it's either in the apartment or the morgue. MeowMix: Sissel: I wasn't here, pally-o. Actual Toaster: Robin: It's Robin. Robin Hood. Actual Toaster: Loki: {If he won't show you to the apartment, try telling him it's for justice, or something like that.} MeowMix: Sissel: *he puts his voice back where it belongs* Sissel. {Gotcha.} Actual Toaster: Robin: A pleasure. MeowMix: Sissel: Could you show us this apartment? Actual Toaster: Robin: Well, I don't know how you plan on getting in. MeowMix: Sissel: With justice and ghost tricks! MeowMix: Sissel: {Like this?} Actual Toaster: Loki: {Well, he looks interested, so that's a start.} Actual Toaster: Robin: That only gets you so far against security systems, you know.. MeowMix: Sissel: Can those detect ghosts? ... Hm, I don't know how to beat those yet.. Actual Toaster: Robin: You'd have to disable it. MeowMix: Izanagi: It'd probably be difficult to do that on site.. Actual Toaster: Robin: I'm not very computer or tech-savvy, so I can't help there. *he takes his bow off the table* MeowMix: Sissel: I know someone who can! But, I doubt he wants to come. Actual Toaster: Robin: I could carry him. MeowMix: Sissel: That won't work if he's insistent enough! Actual Toaster: Robin: It should be a decent challenge?... MeowMix: Sissel: I'd like to watch that attempt! Actual Toaster: Robin: Well, unless you can think of away to get through that security system, I don't think you'll be getting to his body. MeowMix: *Izanagi has already whipped out his phone. What a great device* Actual Toaster: Robin: ? MeowMix: Izanagi: I can figure out who we're talking about. I've already sent a- Oh, that was a fast response. Of just the word "no." Actual Toaster: Robin: Well, then you're out of luck. Actual Toaster: Loki: {Ask him where he put his key.} MeowMix: Sissel: Where'd you put your key? Actual Toaster: Robin: My key? Hmm. *he looks like he's thinking* ...Probably on the counter! MeowMix: Sissel: Inside the building? Actual Toaster: Robin: Yup. Actual Toaster: Loki: {...He continues to surprise me, and not in a good way.} MeowMix: Yomiel: I've already lost I.Q., and I just got here. Actual Toaster: Robin: I feel like I should be offended by that. MeowMix: Yomiel: You should be. From one to ten, just how illegal is this? Actual Toaster: Robin: Uhh.. Well, it's breaking into an apartment, so... MeowMix: Yomiel: Eh. I won't be caught if I do, so, fine. I'm in. MeowMix: Sissel: Important question! Is there a payphone or something near the building that can be called? Actual Toaster: Robin: Oh, yes. There is. Actual Toaster: Robin: Why..? MeowMix: Sissel: I needed to know for my tricky reasons. You guys are going to have to go on ahead of us! Actual Toaster: Robin: Well, okay, that's fine. MeowMix: Yomiel: *he snags a piece of paperand a pen off the table, and scribbles down a number* Call this number when you're there. Hang up on the fourth ring. We'll be there a moment or so after. Actual Toaster: Robin: ...O...kay... I'll do that. MeowMix: Sissel: Thank you! Actual Toaster: Robin: Well, uh, let's go, Izanagi? MeowMix: Izanagi: Right. Actual Toaster: *so nagi and robin Go* MeowMix: Izanagi: *he does not say 'are we there yet'* Actual Toaster: Robin: *when they Arrive, he stops at the payphone and, well, follows yomiel's directions. Hes never been more confused.* MeowMix: *About a minute later, the WotD is opened, and everyone is pulled in! yaaay.* MeowMix: Sissel: {We're here!!} Actual Toaster: Robin: *his immediate reaction is to scream. me too.* Actual Toaster: Loki: {Told you.} MeowMix: Sissel: {You did!} *he drops yomiel's appearance, to make things less confusing* {Should we get going?} Actual Toaster: Robin: *hes still SO CONFUSED but hes not screaming at least* {I- I guess...??} MeowMix: Sissel: {Do you want me to explain all of this on the way there?} Actual Toaster: Robin: {Go right ahead... actually, I'd appreciate it...} MeowMix: *so, on the walk there, sissel explains what the hot shit is going on* Actual Toaster: Robin: So what's the plan for getting in?... MeowMix: Yomiel: {We'll open it up from inside. Wait here.} Actual Toaster: Robin: *He's still extremely confused.* MeowMix: Sissel: In short, ghosts! Actual Toaster: Robin: Wait a second. I know Loki is currently a ghost, but he is too?? MeowMix: Sissel: No, but yes. Which is why we can't take all day. All night? Actual Toaster: Robin: what? MeowMix: Sissel: After! *he goes around the corner, looking for a good way in* Actual Toaster: Robin: Uh, okay.. MeowMix: Izanagi: ... I feel like I'm going to have to play explanation bingo. Actual Toaster: Robin: Yeah, probably. MeowMix: *Meanwhile, Sissel has gotten inside! And realized he has no idea where he is going.* Actual Toaster: Loki: {...Do you need help?} MeowMix: Sissel: {I'm lost.} Actual Toaster: Loki: {Third floor, 318b.} MeowMix: Sissel: {Okay, thanks} *and he looks at the stairs. looks at the door to the stairs. Reaches up and calls the elevator* Actual Toaster: Loki: {Yeah, wasn't sure how you were gonna manage that.} MeowMix: Sissel: {I love modern technology.} Actual Toaster: Loki: {Don't we all?} MeowMix: Sissel: {No idea.} Actual Toaster: *nothing exciting happens. its an elevator* MeowMix: *it doesn't break. someone gets to see a cat leave an elevator. ok* Actual Toaster: *this is Fine* MeowMix: *yes* MeowMix: *and so, sissel goes to 318b* Actual Toaster: *the door is closed.* MeowMix: *Sissel stares up at it* Actual Toaster: Loki: {Any plans?} MeowMix: Sissel: {I have no idea how to open this.} Actual Toaster: Loki: {It's an electronic security system.} MeowMix: Sissel: {Yomiel, help.} MeowMix: *the door unlocks and swings open about twenty seconds later* Actual Toaster: Loki: {That was fast.} MeowMix: Yomiel: {I was already here.} Actual Toaster: Loki: {Were you? You work quickly, then.} MeowMix: Yomiel: {I've learned to.} Actual Toaster: Loki: {That's fair. Should we wait?} MeowMix: Yomiel: {Sure. I'm going to make sure the security is actually down.} Actual Toaster: Loki: {Fair.} MeowMix: Izanagi: *he's here now, with Robin in tow* Actual Toaster: Robin: Oh, you got the door open? MeowMix: Yomiel: {Yes.} Actual Toaster: Robin: *and he enters, like he owns the place. ... wait.* MeowMix: *Sissel turns and walks away. Distant key noise. Key jingling noises. Sissel returns, doing that little strut, with Robin's keys in his mouth.* Actual Toaster: Robin: Hey, those are mine... MeowMix: Sissel: {Exactly!} Actual Toaster: Robin: *He leans down to get his keys* MeowMix: *sissel gives them to robin* Actual Toaster: Robin: Thanks. ..And you know you can come inside, right, Izanagi? MeowMix: Izanagi: ... Oh. Of course. Actual Toaster: Robin: Go ahead and look for his body, since you wanted to. MeowMix: Izanagi: *he looks a bit nervous for a moment, before nodding and walking away* Actual Toaster: *pretty basic apartment. Nothin of note, really--oh that's a bucket of ice water. sorry izanagi* Actual Toaster: Loki: {Whoops.} MeowMix: Izanagi: *he looks less than impressed* Actual Toaster: Robin: What was that? MeowMix: Izanagi: a bucket of water. Actual Toaster: Robin: A bucket of water?? MeowMix: Izanagi: On a door. Actual Toaster: Robin: Oh. Loki probably set that up before he, um. Died. Actual Toaster: Loki: {Stop talking about me like I'm not here.} MeowMix: Izanagi: I'd figured things like this had been taken down by now.. Actual Toaster: Robin: Evidently there were a few that were missed. MeowMix: Izanagi: I see this. Actual Toaster: Robin: You can keep looking, if you want. MeowMix: Izanagi: I intend to. Actual Toaster: Robin: Don't break anything. MeowMix: Izanagi: I won't- At least, not intentionally. Actual Toaster: Robin: Sounds good. I'll help in a minute. MeowMix: *izanagi walks away, again* Actual Toaster: *robin joins him soonish* Actual Toaster: Robin: Find anything? MeowMix: Izanagi: Just this tazer attached to a doorknob. Actual Toaster: Robin: ..I'm going to kick Loki. MeowMix: Izanagi: Not today you aren't. Actual Toaster: Robin: What do you mean not today? MeowMix: Izanagi: Let him recover first. Actual Toaster: Robin: He put a taser on a doorknob.. MeowMix: Izanagi: My point stands. Actual Toaster: Robin: I think this is an exception. MeowMix: Izanagi: We'll see what kind of condition he is in. Actual Toaster: Robin: I'm still kicking him, I'll just be more gentle if it's bad. Actual Toaster: Loki: {Your idea of gentle is very different from actual gentleness.} MeowMix: Izanagi: :< Actual Toaster: Robin: He put a taser on a door. Come on, that deserves a kick. *and he carefully inspects this set up. then removes the taser from the doorknob.* MeowMix: Izanagi: Later. Actual Toaster: Robin: Okay, fine. *he goes to open the door. and. gets electrocuted anyway* MeowMix: Izanagi: ... Ah. Actual Toaster: Robin: *WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO MEEE* MeowMix: Izanagi: *he pulls Robin away from the door, and goes to do it himself* Actual Toaster: *That is a battery.* MeowMix: Izanagi: .... Loki, why? Actual Toaster: Actual Toaster: Loki: {I didn't think the doorknob was metal.} MeowMix: Izanagi: I'm letting him kick you now. Actual Toaster: Loki: {Don't do that...} MeowMix: Izanagi: Are you trying to kill others, too? ... Is there anything else like this? Actual Toaster: Loki: {I'm not TRYING to... And I don't think so.} MeowMix: Yomiel: {Ha. Hahaha.} Actual Toaster: Loki: {What?} MeowMix: Yomiel: {Explain the seven rube goldbergs in this hallway alone.} Actual Toaster: Loki: {There's a reason I'm not allowed to be home alone.} MeowMix: Yomiel: {I see.} Actual Toaster: Loki: {I get bored. The results are not usually this bad, but.} MeowMix: Yomiel: {... Some of these are easy to disassemble.} Actual Toaster: Loki: {Not that big a deal to me..} MeowMix: Yomiel: *he goes to disassemble some of them* Actual Toaster: *Loki does nothing to stop him, not that he can.* Actual Toaster: Robin: Do you want to go look at his room, Izanagi? MeowMix: Izanagi: Sure. Actual Toaster: Robin: Okay, it's this way. MeowMix: *so they head down the hall* Actual Toaster: Robin: *he points to the bookshelf* Actual Toaster: Robin: *so he goes and. opens it* MeowMix: *hello, thy name is knife* Actual Toaster: Robin: you son of a bitch MeowMix: *and it just so happens to be at eye level. shwing* Actual Toaster: Robin: *he leans back* MeowMix: *and it narrowly misses his face* Actual Toaster: Robin: Can't you disarm your traps, Loki? Jeez. MeowMix: Sissel: That could have killed you. Actual Toaster: Robin: I'm aware. MeowMix: Sissel: And then it'd be a mess. Actual Toaster: Robin: Like I said, I'm aware. Let's just get this over with. MeowMix: *does robin go in?* Actual Toaster: *yes he does* MeowMix: *and then, boxing glove. right to the gut* Actual Toaster: Robin: *he drops onto the floor and curls into the fetal position* MeowMix: Yomiel: {Direct hit. I didn't think that was going to be that harmful.} Actual Toaster: Loki: {Nor did I.} MeowMix: Izanagi: We need him, you know. Actual Toaster: Loki: {What for?} MeowMix: Izanagi: Not as deadweight. Actual Toaster: Loki: {He was anyway, wasn't he?} MeowMix: Izanagi: Be nice. Actual Toaster: Loki: {I'm not wrong, am I?} MeowMix: Izanagi: Stop. Actual Toaster: Loki: {What?} MeowMix: Izanagi: ... .... I don't want to go in there anymore. Actual Toaster: Loki: {Eh? Why not?} MeowMix: Izanagi: *he makes this face, somewhere between nervous and disgusted* Actual Toaster: Loki: {Ah.} Actual Toaster: Robin: *he grunts* Do you want me to go in first? MeowMix: Izanagi: Yes, please. Actual Toaster: Robin: Oh, fine. *and he gets up and goes. in. helloooo loki's body, on the floor.* Wow, you've looked better, Loki. Actual Toaster: Loki: {I resent that!} MeowMix: Izanagi: *he looks in* .....ah Actual Toaster: Loki: {Now hurry up and revive me.) Actual Toaster: Robin: I'll consider it. Actual Toaster: Loki: {You're playing a dangerous game, Robin.} MeowMix: Sissel: *he sniffs at Loki's body* Actual Toaster: *it's a dead body. i dont know what he expects.* Actual Toaster: Robin: Uh-huh. *but he samarecarms loki anyway* MeowMix: Sissel: *he places a paw on Loki's face* Actual Toaster: Loki: *he sounds. very hoarse.* ... You know, I don't actually think I can move. MeowMix: Yomiel: {... Do you need help?} Actual Toaster: Loki: If you think you can. MeowMix: Yomiel: {Apologies if I do something harmful.} *and he goes for Loki's core. Hostile Takeover, take 1* Actual Toaster: Loki: "Something harmful", eh? 'S a little vague. MeowMix: Yomiel: {Like this.} *and he goes to stand Loki up* Actual Toaster: Loki: Whoa. Okay, that was a little weird. MeowMix: Yomiel: {Only a little? Would you like to do an irish jig, too, while I'm at it?} Actual Toaster: Loki: Pass. MeowMix: Yomiel: {Good, because I don't know how to dance} Actual Toaster: Loki: That's a shame. Actual Toaster: Loki: ...Y'know, I don't think I can actually feel anything. MeowMix: Yomiel: {That's normal. Give it time.} Actual Toaster: Loki: Oh, is it? That's good. MeowMix: Yomiel: {Look on the bright side. You aren't dead.} Actual Toaster: Loki: I appreciate it, alright. MeowMix: Yomiel: {Good. Just don't take it for granted} Actual Toaster: Loki: Why would I take that for granted? MeowMix: Yomiel: {Most people do.} Actual Toaster: Loki: I've, uh, died before. Not in this.. specific sort of scenario, though. MeowMix: Yomiel: {As have I.} Actual Toaster: Loki: Ah. Noted. MeowMix: *Yomiel drags Loki to the bathroom, to wash his damn face* Actual Toaster: *loki doesnt fight it, since, I mean, I don't think he really can, and he wants to wash his face anyway* MeowMix: *AND IT IS DONE.* Actual Toaster: Robin: ..So what was that face about? MeowMix: Izanagi: I didn't want to see it.. Actual Toaster: Robin: See what? MeowMix: Izanagi: Now, what do you think? Actual Toaster: Robin: Is it because of who it is that was dead? MeowMix: Izanagi: No, but it helped Actual Toaster: Robin: Do you just not like dead things? MeowMix: Izanagi: ... Yes. Actual Toaster: Robin: That's fair. Can't make any judgements about that. Actual Toaster: Robin: I think most people aren't fans of dead things. MeowMix: Izanagi: M-hm.. Actual Toaster: Robin: Ah well. MeowMix: Sissel: we did it, we saved the world, and his life. Actual Toaster: Robin: I don't know about "the world", but sure. Actual Toaster: Robin: Loki and I probably owe everyone an explanation, though, eh... MeowMix: Sissel: About what?? Actual Toaster: Robin: The circumstances leading up to this. MeowMix: Sissel: If you want to! Actual Toaster: Robin: Loki and I are- well, were, now- connected to a kid named Goro Akechi. As in, our lives are linked to his. We're both manifestations of him, if that makes sense. So when Goro got shot, it killed Loki, too. ... I'm not sure how I survived, but I'm not complaining! MeowMix: Sissel: ... Well, I guess there's no changing that. Actual Toaster: Robin: As for what happened with Goro that resulted in him getting shot, well, you might be better off asking Loki. I don't think I can quite put it into words. MeowMix: Sissel: But not now. Actual Toaster: Robin: That's fair! MeowMix: Sissel: :3 Actual Toaster: *ok so since this crew aint doing anything exciting lets see what loki and yoms are up to* Actual Toaster: Loki: Can I have control back? This is kind of inconvenient. MeowMix: Yomiel: {I don't know, can you? Will you be able to function?} Actual Toaster: Loki: Uh, probably? MeowMix: Yomiel: {We'll see.} *yomiel exits stage left* Actual Toaster: *yeah, no, sorry, loki. have fun falling you idiot* MeowMix: Yomiel: {Bye} Actual Toaster: Loki: ... Ah. MeowMix: Yomiel: {So the answer is no.} Actual Toaster: Loki: I suppose so. MeowMix: *so Yomiel zips back in, and stands him back up* Actual Toaster: Loki: I suppose you're going to be here for a while. MeowMix: Yomiel: {I'd rather not.} Actual Toaster: Loki: that's understandable. You are in a stranger's home. MeowMix: Yomiel: {And I'd rather not have extended control.} Actual Toaster: Loki: That's fair. Actual Toaster: Robin: So, how long were you planning to stay anyway? MeowMix: Yomiel: {The minimal amount.} Actual Toaster: Robin: Okay, fine, how long until this one *he gestures to loki* can function? MeowMix: Yomiel: {Fully? .... I've got no idea.} Actual Toaster: Robin: Minimally. MeowMix: Yomiel: {A few days?} Actual Toaster: Robin: Well, that won't work, now will it Actual Toaster: Robin: What do you propose? MeowMix: Sissel: I propose he goes to a vet. Actual Toaster: Loki: I'm not an animal. MeowMix: Sissel: Person vet. Actual Toaster: Robin: Doctor. MeowMix: Sissel: yes, that Actual Toaster: Robin: Is that going to work?... MeowMix: Sissel: Doctors have some kind of magic, so they can fix everything. Or something. Actual Toaster: Robin: Uh, no... People still can die at the doctor's. MeowMix: Sissel: ​what Actual Toaster: Robin: Sometimes there are things they just can't fix. Actual Toaster: Loki: Cancer. MeowMix: Yomiel: {Please don't explain cancer to my cat.} Actual Toaster: Loki: Okay, okay, I won't. MeowMix: Sissel: And now I want to know. Actual Toaster: Loki: Don't worry about it! Actual Toaster: Robin: Would taking him to a doctor work, though?.. MeowMix: Izanagi: It'd probably be in our best interest to do so. Actual Toaster: Robin: Okay, then, I suppose we can do that. MeowMix: Raphael: *he lightly knocks on the window, and gives Izanagi and thumbs up.* MeowMix: Izanagi: ... I was hoping he'd use the door. Actual Toaster: Robin: oh. MeowMix: Izanagi: Phones are wonderful technology, used to contact others. *he opens the window for Raph, pulls him in, and closes the window. You know it's cold outside when it's cold outside* Actual Toaster: Loki: Oh, it's you. MeowMix: Raphael: Hi, Loki. Actual Toaster: Loki: Hi, Raphael. MeowMix: Yomiel: {Abandoning ship in 3.} Actual Toaster: Loki: Alright. MeowMix: *Yomiel sits Loki down, and gets outta there* MeowMix: Raphael: ...? Actual Toaster: *and loki immediately basically... the best way I can think of to describe it is he just. sags down. like a doll, I guess? idk* MeowMix: Raphael: ??? Actual Toaster: Loki: Hi, I've been dead for about 3 days. MeowMix: Raphael: Ah. *he looks at Izanagi* I'm glad you messaged me. The longer one is dead before being revived, the longer recovery can take- And their body might simply give up and die again. *he looks back to Loki, sitting down on a nearby chair* How long ago were you revived? Actual Toaster: Loki: An. hour? Maybe? Ish. MeowMix: Raphael: You're speaking, so your respiratory system is fine.. How's your motor control? Actual Toaster: Loki: my what MeowMix: Raphael: Controlling your own muscles. Can you stand at all? Actual Toaster: Loki: Ah, no, I cannot. MeowMix: (at least i think thats what it means. i know what fine motor is tho) MeowMix: Raphael: So fine motor control is right out.. How do you feel overall? Actual Toaster: Loki: Not much of anything. Actual Toaster: Loki: Physically, anyway MeowMix: Raphael: And mentally? Actual Toaster: Loki: eh. could be better. MeowMix: Raphael: I need a bit more than that, please. Actual Toaster: Loki: Okay.. What, specifically, about my mental state? MeowMix: Raphael: Well, you stated it could be better. What is making it worse? Actual Toaster: Loki: Persistent feeling of emptiness MeowMix: Raphael: M-hm.. I can understand that, given the information I'd been given. Actual Toaster: Loki: I think that's the only thing, really.. MeowMix: Raphael: ... All right. Actual Toaster: Loki: ..? MeowMix: Raphael: I'll ask for more details later. Actual Toaster: Loki: Sounds good. MeowMix: Raphael: *he looks to the others* Might I ask for you all to leave the room? I'd like to be able to speak privately with him. Actual Toaster: Robin: Uh, we can go into the hall, if that works? MeowMix: Raphael: That's fine. Actual Toaster: Robin: Alright. *so he exits, stage left. Presumably erryone else goes with him* Actual Toaster: Loki: ... So? MeowMix: Raphael: .... I may not have had the same experiences as you, but I can understand what this is like for you. Remember- You might feel empty, but you're certainly not alone. Actual Toaster: Loki: ...*he averts his eyes* I'll keep that in mind. MeowMix: Raphael: Great. Actual Toaster: Loki: I've been trying not to think about it, and I was doing good, too! And then you go and make me think about it. You meddling medic with no dog... *he laughs* MeowMix: Raphael: *he smiles a little* I do apologize, and I'll drop the subject. Here, hold on. *he goes into his bag, and pulls out one of those little containers of ice cream you can buy for like five bucks.* Actual Toaster: Loki: I won't be able to eat that right now. Not until I can actually move. MeowMix: Raphael: I'll save it for when you can. Actual Toaster: Loki: That's fine. We've got a freezer if you wanna put it away now. MeowMix: Raphael: Sure. *he goes and pops into the hall, and disappears for about a minute. He's then back, and shuts the door again. he moves his chair a bit closer to Loki, and sits down* I see that frown. What's going through your mind now? Actual Toaster: Loki: ...Nothing good. MeowMix: Raphael: Share. Actual Toaster: Loki: Am I required to..? MeowMix: Raphael: ... Actually, no. *he gets up again, and moves his chair to riiight next to Loki's* Actual Toaster: Loki: *he looks away from raph and to the door* MeowMix: Raphael: They aren't eavesdropping, if that's what you're wondering. Actual Toaster: Loki: I don't think so. MeowMix: Raphael: *he holds his hands up* You've got my word- I won't share anything you tell me. Actual Toaster: Loki: I.. don't know where to start.. MeowMix: Raphael: Wherever you want. Actual Toaster: Loki: I... Actual Toaster: Loki: *he swallows* I'm.. I wasn't enough. MeowMix: Raphael: You did what you could. Sometimes, the whole world could do their best and it wouldn't be enough. What matters is that you tried. Actual Toaster: Loki: It.. it was my job to look after him, and I failed that. I should be dead, too... and I'm not. Actual Toaster: Loki: I don't even know if he knew that I did care about him, or if he died thinking I didn't like him...! *his voice breaks and he shakily inhales* MeowMix: Raphael: Survivor's guilt. *he shakes his head* I'd think, with the connection you shared, that he'd known. It'd only make sense. Actual Toaster: Loki: *he chokes on a sob and sniffs* I should have... done more for him, expressed properly that I cared, anything... but I didn't, and it's too late now..! And now I'm left with nothing...! Actual Toaster: Loki: It hurts to be here.. to think he'll walk around the corner and it'll be okay... but knowing he won't, I... I can't... I.. MeowMix: Raphael: *he slowly puts an arm around Loki's shoulders* There isn't ever "nothing". Come here. *and he lightly pulls Loki into a hug* Actual Toaster: Loki: *boy does he try not to cry and boy does he fail* MeowMix: *and that's fine.* Actual Toaster: Loki: I don't.. have anywhere to go... I don't... know what to do.. why..why does it have to hurt so much...? I.. *and he chokes on a sob* Actual Toaster: Loki: I.. I tried not to get attached... And I tried to d-do my job, but it wasn't enough and it won't ever be enough..! I shouldn't.. I don't deserve to be here... it's not fair.. MeowMix: Raphael: Untrue. You did what you could. Actual Toaster: Loki: *he looks to the wall, instead of raph* I.. I can't agree with that. MeowMix: Raphael: *he shakes his head* It is going to take time.. But this kind of talk will only make you worse-off. You were attached, correct? ... Instead of hating yourself, why not properly mourn for him? Actual Toaster: Loki: ...... I suppose.. but I.. don't have his body.. MeowMix: Raphael: We don't need to. Actual Toaster: Loki: ..? MeowMix: Raphael: Before I say, how would you mourn him if you could choose? Actual Toaster: Loki: I... I don't know.. MeowMix: Raphael: Ah, well. There's time. Actual Toaster: Loki: I suppose.. Actual Toaster: Loki: ..Can you... do me a favor, maybe? MeowMix: Raphael: Yes? Actual Toaster: Loki: In my coat pocket, the one on the left, that is, is my phone... text Apollo and tell him I'm OK, please. MeowMix: Raphael: Ah, yes. I will. *he grabs Loki's phone* MeowMix: Raphael: [to Apollo] Loki is alive. He asked me to message you for him- So I am! ^^ ~Raphael MeowMix: Apollo: [to Raphael]: TELL HIM THSATY I THOUGH HE WAS DEAD!1 I WANMA COMEW OVER THEERE! AND TYYY FOR TELLINFG ME! MeowMix: Raphael: He's very pleased to know you're alive. Actual Toaster: Loki: I can't say I'm surprised... Actual Toaster: Loki: Thanks for texting him for me, though. MeowMix: Raphael: Of course ^^ Actual Toaster: Loki: I'll.. try to sort out things with myself.. later. Not right now, though. MeowMix: Raphael: Of course not. Resting is important, too! Actual Toaster: Loki: I don't think I'll be able to sleep, but it's really all I can do at this point... MeowMix: Raphael: Do your best. Actual Toaster: Loki: *He sighs* I'll try. Actual Toaster: Loki: ...you'll have to carry me to my bed, though. MeowMix: Raphael: That's fine! *he carrrrefully lifts Loki, and brings him to his bed* Actual Toaster: Loki: Thanks. ... If you want to stick around, you can either sleep on the couch or in Goro's room. MeowMix: Raphael: The first's already taken, and I'd rather not the second. It's fine! Actual Toaster: Loki: Alright, then. Have a good night. MeowMix: *and raph finally exits stage left* Actual Toaster: *during the night (when loki regains his ability to move), loki winds up going out of his room in favor of lying as close to izanagi as he possibly can without making contact, since, he doesnt wanna wake nagi up or anything. no-contact rule probably gets broken by loki later but HEY ITS MORNING NOW SO* MeowMix: Izanagi: *good morning world what the fuck is next to me* Actual Toaster: *its loki, curled into a small ball* MeowMix: Izanagi: ... Ah. Actual Toaster: Robin: No idea when he showed up, but there he is. MeowMix: Izanagi: I see. Actual Toaster: Robin: at least he hasn't gone and wrapped himself around you like a weird python.. MeowMix: Izanagi: I suppose.. Actual Toaster: Robin: Do you want anything to eat?.. MeowMix: Izanagi: Please. Actual Toaster: Robin: Anything in particular? We have cereal, oatmeal, toast.. MeowMix: Izanagi: No real preference. Actual Toaster: Robin: Toast, then. *and he exits, goin to make nagi his toast.* MeowMix: Izanagi: *he sits up and stretches* Actual Toaster: Loki: *he slowly uncurls and yawns* ...Wh' time's it? MeowMix: Izanagi: I've got no idea. Actual Toaster: Loki: Ah...is the sun out..? *he drapes an arm over his eyes* MeowMix: Izanagi: Yes. Actual Toaster: Loki: Mgh. I don't wanna get up. MeowMix: Izanagi: Then don't. Actual Toaster: Loki: I can't sleep all day, though.. MeowMix: Izanagi: I'd rather you didn't. Actual Toaster: Loki: I wasn't planning on it. MeowMix: Izanagi: Then you're getting up.